3 Months

Benjamin is 3 months old!  I truly can’t believe it!  He looks and acts so much older.  I love to watch him grow and change everyday.   I am so blessed to be able to be at home with him to soak up every precious moment.

Daddy was away in China this past week for a business trip.  It was his first time away from Benjamin, and I could tell he really missed him!  We missed Dad a lot, too.  Benjamin and I stayed over at my parents house for a few days, though, and that was lots of fun!  We took him for walks by the lake, baked some cookies with grandma, and took baths in their awesome bathroom!  His baby tub was in their steam shower, and we wrapped him up in a heated towel from the towel warmer when he was done.  Benjamin was living the life!

He just came down with his first cold this week, too. :( That is why his 3 month picture is a little late; this is technically 3 months and 3 days old!  His first virus was probably harder on me than him.  It was really sad to watch him struggling to breathe, coughing up a storm, and sneezing nonstop.  He was kind of lethargic and just not himself overall.  I am really anxious for him to feel better!  He already seems to be doing much better than he was a few days ago.  Saline spray, the Nosefrida, Baby Vicks, and warm baths really helped!!

One of my best friends, Sara, had a baby this past week!  She is the first of my friends to have a baby since I’ve had Benjamin.  From the moment she told me she was going into the hospital I couldn’t stop thinking about her!  Having just gone through it myself, I was so excited for her to experience the birth of her first child. I teared up when I got her text that their baby girl, Finley Sophia, had finally arrived.  Those first moments are like no other.  It was the most emotional and wonderful day of my entire life.  One that I will never forget, that’s for sure!!

Ok, on to the 3 month stats...

Age : 3 months

Weight : 15 pounds

Clothing and Diaper Size : Size 6-9 month clothes, and size 2 diapers.

Milestones :  Benjamin has started to recognize his mommy and daddy, which is so much fun.  He will still flash his big adorable smile at strangers, but Mom and Dad get the biggest smiles now!  And he will search for me in a room when I am not holding him.  I love it!  I can tell his vision is getting much better because he will stare at me from across the room.  He has started to follow objects more and more.  He grabs at things, too!  When he plays under his activity mat he loves to try to grab the plastic animals that dangle above him.  Benjamin is talking SO much these days, too!  He is making all kinds of new noises.  Sometimes I will talk back to him, and we can go back and forth in our little baby conversation for 10 minutes. So fun!  He avoids tummy time at all costs, but when he does lie on his tummy you can tell he is trying to roll over.  Hasn’t happened again since the one day he did it in his crib, though!  His neck muscles are getting stronger by the day, too.  Such a big boy!

Sleep : Around 10 weeks Benjamin started going to sleep at 10:30pm and only waking up once (around 3 or 4) for a feeding.  Then something magical happened. :) At 12 weeks he slept through the night!  The first time it happened, I opened my eyes to find that it was light in our bedroom and PANICKED!  Why hasn’t he gotten up to eat?!  I was so worried in that initial moment.  Then I looked down at my sweet boy sleeping peacefully in his bassinet, and I was thrilled!  He had slept through the night.  He typically sleeps through the night about 3 or 4 times a week.  There’s still a handful nights each week when he wakes up to eat around 3 or 4am.  I honestly don’t mind, though.  I love those late night feedings now.  It’s so quiet in the house, and he is so snuggly after he finishes eating. :)  Pretty special moments.

Eating : Benjamin was in the 80^th percentile for weight at his last doctors appointment (10 weeks old), and I can see why – this boy loves to eat!  He eats about every 2 ½ hours during the day.  He was eating for a full 20 minutes on BOTH sides (sometimes even 25 minutes!), and I was beginning to wonder if 90% of my life would be spent sitting on the couch breastfeeding!!  Just in the last few days I have noticed him becoming a bit faster, though.  He is satisfied after about 15-18 minutes (still on both sides).  Slowly but surely, we are making progress! 

While we were over at my parents’ house for dinner the other night, Andrea and I went into the foyer (which we have lovingly renamed the lactation room) to feed Tia and Ben.  Andrea fed Tia, burped her, changed her diaper, and did some tummy time with her....and Benjamin was still eating on the first side!  Haha, maybe he’ll get there someday.  Or maybe he’ll just be my slow, dainty little eater – which is just fine. :)

Favorites : Eating, watching the TV (when he can get away with it!), sucking his thumb (aw!), watching his mobile in his crib, mirrors, toys that light up, napping on his tummy in his crib, bath time, heated towels from the towel warmer at Grandma’s, massages after his bath, Daddy making silly noises and faces with him, and his activity mat with the piano that he kicks and “plays” with his feet.

Doesn't like : Being in his Ergo Baby carrier (he used to love it so this makes me sad!), being hungry, tummy time, napping in his car seat, and pacifiers.

We are moms - and that should be enough.

The Unnatural Mom

This blog post struck a cord with me. I really struggled with the fact that I failed to bring Benjamin into the world naturally. In the weeks after he arrived I blamed myself for the need for a c-section. Maybe if I had just pushed harder...or longer... Should I have said no to the epidural? Maybe I didn't handle the contractions properly. Did I do too much to try to induce labor earlier that day? Maybe he wasn't really ready to come yet. 

I also really beat myself up over his blood sugar struggles. The poor thing was stuck in a NICU bed with IVs and cords all over him for 5 days, and I felt like it was all my fault. My diabetes put him there. What if my blood sugar had been in better control during labor? Did I do enough to control my sugars during my pregnancy? Should I have allowed the nurses to regulate my insulin during delivery rather than doing it myself? 

I talked with my OB about the delivery at my 2 week appointment. She helped me understand that the c-section was totally necessary because of Benjamin's size and posterior position. There was absolutely nothing I could've done to help him come naturally. He was in fetal distress, and might not have survived if we hadn't intervened with a c-section. 

Then I talked with my endocrinologist about Benjamin's blood sugar problems. The doctor said in his 20 years of practicing medicine, he had never worked with an expectant mom who had been in better control during her pregnancy. He said he wanted to "frame my lab work papers"! He insisted that I couldn't have done anything more. 

Thankfully I came to terms with everything that happened with the help of my doctors and Chris's support. But it definitely took some time. To all the other moms out there reading - you are doing a great job!! "We are moms - and that should be enough." <3

Schedules and Routines

Being a new parent is one of the hardest things I've ever experienced!  I am constantly second guessing myself and worrying about every. little. thing.  Am I feeding him enough?  Too much?  Should he be sleeping more?  Less?  Am I holding him too much?  Should I let him sleep in my arms or in the carseat?  Only in his crib?  Is his diaper too tight?  What time should he go to bed?  Should I let him nurse to sleep?  Should he be on a schedule?  Why is he spitting up so much?  I heard a toot but he JUST fell asleep - do I wake him to change the diaper, or let him (and me!) sleep peacefully?  :)

THE LIST GOES ON!!!  Seriously, I bet I spend 95% of my day worrying and wondering if I'm doing this parenting thing right!  This article is spot on.  There are so many theories about how to parent, and it seems like they all contradict themselves, as this lady hilariously states!

Lately a lot of my questions have been in regard to sleeping and whether or not Benjamin should be on a schedule.  I have read lots of books and websites, and think I might have finally figured him out - for now. :)

Before I talk about our 2 month routine (which I say very loosely), here are some of the places I got information on babies and sleep!

The Baby Sleep Site 

Healthy Sleep Habits, Healthy Child Book

The Baby Whisperer Book

Lucie's List 

The last one, Lucie's list, is a great site for all kinds of baby info.  She sends weekly emails based on the week of pregnancy you are in, or the age of your baby once he/she is born.  Her last email was all about schedules and sleep.  It was so nice to have her confirm that what I was doing was right!

Now onto Benjamin's current routine.  Since he was born, I have abided by the 2 hours of wakefulness rule.  This simply means that after your newborn has been awake 2 hours (or sometimes much less!), they are usually in need of a nap.  This was totally true for our little guy.  He is starting to be able to stay awake a little bit longer now that he is 9 weeks (around 3 hours tops).  For example, let's say in the morning he wakes up around 7:00am.  He has a diaper change, eats for about 40 minutes, and then we play for a bit.  By the time 9:30am rolls around, he is yawning and staring off into space - his signs that he is getting very sleepy!  

Speaking of signs that he is sleepy, it is really important to try to pay attention to those.  I've learned the hard way that if he is yawning and looking tired, you need to start soothing him to sleep STAT.  It doesn't matter if you have guests over, or if you need to run another errand.  It is really important to respect their sleepy cues because otherwise you will have an overtired, cranky little one.  And that is no fun!

Another thing I have learned is how to better soothe him to sleep.  It took quite a while for me to figure this out!  The books I listed above actually contradict themselves on one important thing: whether or not it is ok to nurse your baby to sleep.  The Baby Whisperer says you are creating bad habits, while Healthy Sleep Habits says it is a totally natural thing.  I have decided that for Benjamin and I, it is ok.  I don't nurse him to sleep every time by any means.  But if it is around the time he should be going to sleep, and he happens to fall asleep while eating, I don't wake him up!  I have learned other ways to help him drift off to dreamland, too.  Some include: car rides, rocking him with a paci, laying him down on his tummy in the crib while patting his back with a paci, and white noise.

So now a days, Benjamin's daily routine looks something like this:

7am - wake up

9 or 10am - morning nap

1 or 2pm - afternoon nap

5 or 6pm - nighttime nap

10pm - bedtime

His naps usually last anywhere from 1/2 hour to 2 hours.  I said routine loosely because this is by no means a set schedule!  This is what I have noticed him doing on his own.  He basically set his own "schedule".  Now with that being said, there are many days where he will skip one of these naps.  Or he will want to stay up until 11pm!  Or he will sleep a bit later in the morning.  This is just a rough idea of what we have going on on a day to day basis.

I have to admit something.  I used to think it was silly when parents said they couldn't eat dinner at a certain time or go someplace during the day because their baby had to eat or take a nap.  But let me tell you, I totally understand now!  Benjamin sleeps SO much better at home in his crib.  And that makes for a happy, smiley, fun baby (and a happy, smiley, fun Mommy!).  Sometimes I feel rude that I have to leave places or I can't make it to certain events because of this, but hopefully people understand.  If they don't, I truly think someday they will - after they have kids, like I did! :)

Well, those are my words of wisdom for now...until Benjamin switches it up on me again. :)